Your Free Trial of Human Connection Has Expired

I woke up today trying to buy something online. I had more than enough in my account—no overdrafts, no shady subscriptions draining me at 3 AM. Still, the screen blinked at me like it knew something I didn’t:

"Transaction declined. Please contact your bank for support."

The irony stung deeper than it should’ve. Not because I couldn’t pay for what I wanted, but because I’d been waking up with that same notification echoing in my chest for years—just with a different currency. My social balance was bankrupt. My emotional account? Overdrawn. My inbox? A graveyard of blue ticks, unanswered messages, and once-bright threads now faded gray.

I stared at that error like it was gospel. Transaction declined. Please contact society for support.

But what if society’s support line is permanently down?

The Emotional Economy

There’s this concept in psychology called Attachment Theory. In short, it says the way our parents cared for us (or didn’t) shapes how we handle relationships. Some people are clingy, some avoid closeness altogether, and some hover somewhere in between—just functional enough to not alarm the system, but always a step away from chaos.

In my case? My parents were too busy. Not neglectful, just… professionally occupied. I grew up learning logic, not affection. I mastered debate, not closeness. I could calculate my way through calculus but couldn’t decipher why someone would laugh at your joke today and ghost you tomorrow.

I never understood why friendships were so… elastic. Why someone could vent to you at 2 AM, call you their soulmate in casual conversation, and then vanish into a haze of unread stories and passive likes.

Was this friendship? Or just society going through the motions?

Rousseau’s Mistake… Or Mine?

Back in high school, I flirted with sociology. Rousseau, in particular, stumped me. He wrote The Social Contract, a philosophical mic drop that claimed society functions on mutual, unwritten agreements: you give, I give. We share, we coexist. The commons thrive.

I hated it. I thought I was better than that. I wanted to believe people were kind for the sake of kindness. That helping didn’t need a return. That relationships weren’t ledgers balancing favor with favor.

But now? Now I see it. He was right. Most friendships are transactional. Trend-based. A temporary loyalty until your “insta game” falls behind or you stop being “funny enough” in group chats. You’re out of sync, you’re out of the circle.

And if you’re not getting anything in return? You’re not in a friendship. You’re providing a service.

Ghosted by the Commons

Looking back, I feel like I violated the contract Rousseau laid out. I gave and gave and didn’t ask for much. I was idealistic. Stupidly so. I thought consistency alone could carry relationships.

But in this world, you need an entry. You don’t just talk to someone anymore. You match on an app. You bond over a TV show algorithm shoved down your throat. You make people laugh—not because you’re funny—but because humor is the modern currency of relevance.

Otherwise? You’re out. Ghosted. Left on read. Replaced by someone shinier.

Emotional Intelligence Is Overrated

People worship emotional intelligence like it’s sainthood. But to me, it's chaos wrapped in a smile. It doesn’t follow any logic. It’s selfish, impulsive, and manipulative when it wants to be. It gives you just enough connection to feel addicted and then disappears without a trace. It’s a game of validation, not depth.

I always chose friends with logic. Or at least those who blended EQ with IQ. But never EQ alone. That’s a gamble I wasn’t willing to lose.

Idealism Is Dead. Long Live the Algorithm

Middle school was my war with social anxiety. High school was my protest against Rousseau. But now? Now I see the world for what it is.

We don’t make friends anymore. We access them.

We don’t connect. We engage.

We don’t support. We react.

Kindness without context is creepy. Helping without history is weird. If you’re not part of someone’s ecosystem, you’re spam.

Everything is taxed—even your presence.

Surrender

So I’m done paying for things I never bought.

Done investing where the ROI is zero.

Done writing long texts that get answered with a “k.”

It's time to prune. To audit. To cut the emotional subscription fees.

To keep only those who swipe in both directions.

I think that’s what Rousseau would do today—if he had an Instagram.

So yeah.

Transaction declined: Please

 contact society for support.

Just don’t expect anyone to answer.